MENOPAUSE AND ME. …AND YOU?

A woman’s journey through the rite of Menopause

It was at around forty that I first started to recognise some distressing physical and psychological symptoms, which affected my sense of health and wellbeing. These symptoms were caused by the early failure of the ovaries, which a condition described by medical science as ‘Primary Ovarian Insufficiency’. It can also be described as premature menopause or ‘peri-menopause’. I resonated with this term but not with the fact.

I remember starting to feel slightly concerned. Yet, I told myself that there was nothing to be alarmed about ‘everyone has good and bad days- don’t they’? However, the symptoms increased and when my bleeding started to become irregular- sometimes more, sometimes less, my concerns started to increase. I suffered from the following symptoms:
* Hot flushes
* Bloating
* Irritability
* Mood swings
* Headaches
* Sleeplessness

I felt I did not want to just live with these symptoms and started to search for some alternative ways to alleviate the problems.

I took up Tai Chi to help me relax and to stabilize the mood swings. I started to move my body and exercise more to combat the sleeplessness and increased my intake of fresh fruits and vegetables to alleviate the bloating. Incorporating breathing exercises would allow more oxygen to pass to the brain and help to reduce the strong headaches. Overall, I tried to keep a positive mental attitude. My self-talk went something like this: “I am still in my best years, I have now more wisdom, more maturity and more experience professionally and personally than ever before. These are the best years etc. etc.

However, the existing symptoms went from disturbing to painful. I realized I had finally outgrown peri menopause (yippee) just to be entering “Menopause”. A new stage which is medically defined as the falling out of balance of the two female hormones Oestrogen and Progesterone. The gradual decline of these two hormones leads to negative changes in the body and the skin condition. I remember that the self-talk was not really working any more and I got rather distressed. I had the following symptoms:
* Debilitating migraine headaches
* Breast Pain
* Joint Pain
* Gum Problems
* Muscles Tensions
* Itchy dry and tight skin
* Digestive problems

I immediately got active and started to search around for answers in the conventional ways. I consulted my doctor, looked up online sources, and contacted the Menopause Centre Australia. I researched topics such as Menopause and Sex, Vaginal dryness and Vaginal Atrophy (thinning of the vaginal walls during menopause). I read books such as ‘Menopause- make it easy’ by Kendra Sundquist and ‘Menopause and managing your Life’ by Dr. M. Stoppard.

I realized that my frantic search for an answer was a way to try to stave off the inevitable and I slowly found myself sinking into a depression. I was forced to stop and realized that only I could transform my understanding of the whole experience. I needed to reframe my relationship to this natural phenomenon. This allowed me to get away from a medical model to recognize Menopause as a part of nature. A natural rite of passage, just like the menstrual cycle, pregnancy and childbirth. Instead of fighting against the biological clock, what I wanted to do is to support this process and to transform my entire take on the condition as a natural part of life. I decided to ‘like’ my stage in life seeing it as one of the seasons that was just new and different to the others I was accustomed to.

The fact that 75% of the all women worldwide were experiencing the same condition was a supportive and empowering idea. I felt a close sisterhood with women and this acceptance freed up new energy and life. I realized that most help on the market was of a medical nature e.g. HRT or Hormone Replacement Therapy. I refused to believe that menopause had to mean a total deterioration to the skin of a woman. This belief (fuelled partly by vanity) allowed me to direct my newfound energy into developing the concept of a menopausal skin care regime that would support the skin and prevent further deterioration.

My appearance is an important contributor to my well-being. There is an undeniable link between looking your best and feeling your best. So even if you are undergoing menopause you can be a mature, wise, calm and well-balanced woman who enjoys the natural process of aging. A skin care regime which targets the menopausal skin, a little make up (as less is often more) and a good dose of humour will see you through even if you are like me in post menopause. At 62 I still get fatigued and the occasional hot flush, but I know how to work with it instead of fighting nature. I have learnt how to master this stage of life. As they say “all good things take time”.

With Love and Support,
Gabrielle